Dec 16 / Simcha

How to Ask for What You Want

Working with couples, it strikes me over and over how instinctively partners move to the aggressive or passive/ avoidant end of the communication spectrum.

The former approach entails a readiness to attack, confront, criticize, or cast aspersion, and quickly escalates a conflictual exchange that could be so much more easily resolved. The latter promotes a sense of powerlessness in the relationship, self-pity and self-victimization, sulking, withdrawal, internalized and growing resentment, and does little to move a situation or dynamic in new directions.

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Dec 07 / Simcha

It All Matters (L. McBride)

In her heart-wrenching novel narrated in four distinct voicesLaura McBride looks at the humanness behind, and the significance of, our every action.  And she suggests that it all really does matter.   

The book’s title — We Are Called to Rise is drawn from the quote by poet Emily Dickenson:  “We never know how high we are, Till we are called to rise; And then, if we are true to plan, Our statures touch the skies.”  The following two eloquent quotes capture the book’s essence.

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Sep 24 / Simcha

How to Handle Toxic People  (K. Schreiber)

Many of us have been challenged by toxic people in our lives who spew negativity, leaving us feeling somehow demeaned and deflated.  From the Latin word toxikon, meaning “arrow poison,” the term toxic means literally: to fill or poison in a targeted way, says Theo Veldsman, head of Industrial Psychology and People Management at the University of Johannesburg.

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