Aug 10 / Simcha

Are You There for Me?

Securely attached partners are better able to navigate the trials and tribulations that life has a habit of bringing our way.  Knowing we have a safe and secure base from which we can draw sustenance and strength, and to which we can always return, allows us to go confidently out into the world.

This sort of secure attachment, teaches Susan Johnson (Emotional Focused Therapy), is shaped by mutual emotional accessibility and responsiveness.  What may appear on the surface as fights about kids, money or sex, is really a fundamental challenge to whether the partner is emotional accessible and responsive.  The underlying questions being asked in most such arguments are:  Are you really there for me?  Do I matter to you? Will you turn towards me and respond to me? How important am I to you?

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Aug 10 / Simcha

What REALLY Turns People On?

A new book entitled A Billion Wicked Thoughts: What the World’s Largest Experiment Reveals About Human Desire purports to have revealed  profound differences between the sexual brains of men and women.

Two young cognitive neuroscientists who met as graduate students at Boston University, Ogi Ogas and Sai Gaddam claim to have studied the secret sexual behavior of more than a hundred million men and women around the world by observing what people do within the anonymity of the Internet. Alfred Kinsey, by comparison, personally interviewed some 18,000 subjects (middle-class Caucasians) in the 1950s.

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